34: Reset

So here I am, 34 posts in, and I’m still trying to figure out what to do with this forum. I’m not fully sure that I have to do anything specific - it’s just a place for me to air my thoughts. But I do want it to be interesting for people (many who don’t know me) to read. I don’t want to continually rehash my fears about my disease - but I do want to continue to be both informative and helpful. I don’t want to continually rehash my fears about the world - and America in general. You all know exactly what I think. I hope I’m informative and helpful here - and not seen as just another whiner. I really do try to keep my rants as topical as possible. And I know a few of you have enjoyed my musical musings, but the level of commentary and engagement has dropped off, so I think making that a primary focus was the wrong move. Perhaps only when something really musically important crosses my path will I write about it. It was also negatively impacting my morning routine because I couldn’t always find an on-line version for you all to enjoy along with my descriptions, so sometimes I didn’t actually listen to what I wanted to. I skipped a few mornings this week, and really noticed that it impacted (negatively) my day. It has really become a necessity for me. (Part of the skipping was the change in time - I needed to move my setup to a darker space, which I did.)

Here’s what happened. I had a great idea for writing about musicians that have teamed up to create new and different output. I wrote the first one, and really enjoyed both the listen and what I wrote. It’s here:

Many great artists have found a (or several) person (s) with whom they’ve managed to transcend their own greatness. Sometimes that’s in the form of a band (there is not a single record by any of the Beatles, for example, that equals the output of the foursome), and sometimes it’s a one on one. Two people who have a successful solo (or band) output joining forces to create something new and perhaps better (or different) than they each did alone. For example, No-Man, who we’ve discussed during the Steven Wilson posts create something completely different then any of Wilson’s other output. It’s a great pairing that has yielded fantastic results. Sometimes it’s a matter of finding the right producer - who sees your potential - maybe even that you don’t see - and helps you elevate your craft. I mean, what would Blue Oyster Cult have sounded like without Bruce Dickinson telling them to use some more cowbell? Together they created magic. Miles Davis and John Coltrane joined forces for a time, and transcended jazz music.

One of the most fruitful and interesting musical pairings of recent days to my ears, is that of the oft mentioned Bill Laswell and Italian guitarist, electronic wizard and producer Eraldo Bernocchi. Together they have released a staggering amount of great work and I started this morning with a group called Somma (which stands for Sacred Order of Magick, Music and Art). This record was recorded live in 2002 at the Santa Chiara auditorium in Trento, Italy in honor of (and for) the Dalai Lama. Accompanying Bernocchi (guitar, electronics) and Laswell (bass) were a group of Tibetan monks on traditional instruments and vocals, acclaimed jazz drummer Hamid Drake (a frequent Laswell collaborator), Japanese trumpet player Toshinori Kondo (RIP), and vocalists Ejigayehu Shibabaw (Gigi) from Ethiopia and Gennaro Della Volpe (aka Raiz) who hails from Naples, Italy. I’ll drop a little “stupid me” moment here. I was today years old when I learned that the concert was in Trento. I’d always thought it was in Naples, at the church with the same name. I even went there in 2007 during a visit to what is my favorite area of Italy, as a pilgrimage to a special night. The church in Naples is amazing, and I wandered the courtyard imagining how special it must have been to see such transcendent music in such a wonderful location. The good news is that I might actually be driving through Trento in September - and have a chance to rectify my nearly 20 year old error.

On to the music. The concert (and live album) opens with Tibetan wind instruments being played over Bernocchi’s ambient washes of sound while Raiz sings (I think) wordless vocals. At about two and a half minutes the bass - a deep dubby bass - and drums kick in. It’s really an otherworldly sound, with the Tibetan instrumentation weaving around the bass and drums, while the guitar plays a funky rhythm. And then, the trumpet kicks in. Kondo was a master of trumpet based electronics - creating tones that have not been heard too often before. He was Miles Davis on steroids. The track winds down, as Raiz returns to usher us from the heights.

The second track, Bon, is one of the best tracks the Bernocchi/Laswell/Kondo trio has ever produced. Some of Laswell’s most inspired bass playing, a great guitar solo from Bernocchi, and Kondo and the monks weaving their horns in and out of space. The drums are, I think, live mixed to add echo and reverb. A great listen. No voices on this one though. A purely instrumental piece.

We follow that with Namkhazod, which features the ethereal singing of the monks, wrapped around abstract dub basslines and steady drumming from Drake. As Kondo and Bernocchi weave their way into the track, we are - again - transformed deep into ourselves, simultaneously bopping to the rhythm and swaying to the vocals. Kondo takes off and soars over the voices creating new ideas on how sound can be manipulated.

Next up we are graced with the golden voice of Gigi. Her singing is just so pure. Like bells. After a nearly ambient start, by halfway through the track, we are nearly funky, with Raiz adding his rap (mostly in Italian) to the mix. All the while, Gigi and Kondo are weaving lines over Laswell’s dubby bass. The track reaches a blissful crescendo before relaxing into a peaceful end.

The final track brings the voices of the monks back into play through heavy echo effects. Kondo intersperses abstract lines, while Laswell explores the harmonic edges of the bass. Drake holds down the fort lest the entire ensemble take off into the ether. By the end of the track, the rest of the vocalists have rejoined and trade chants among themselves. Bernocchi closes the track with some deep sustain on his guitar and ever so slowly we fade to black.

A truly innovative and, dare I say, essential listen for me. Deeply meditative yet grooving. A really unique set by musical masters.

I mention this concept today because teamwork is essential to me as I navigate my illness (and life in general). My primary team member keeps me on point, and is the main adjudicator of my brain health (considering that my Neurologist won’t commit to any further testing). So, when I take a risk and have Exosome treatment (or NAD+ or light experiments or anything like that) Wendy is who I count on to tell me if she sees any change in my cognition or state of mind. She’s who I will count on to keep me alive, for only as long as I want, and to ensure that my wishes are met - even if they are not quite what she’s ready for. I’ve mentioned this in the past, but can’t stress how essential that she is to my continued progress. She’s got some health issues of her own, and I will strive to be the same for her, for as long as I can.

But then I couldn’t really come up with anything else that I wanted to hear or write about using this as a topic. I listened to a few great things - many of which I’d already touched on in other posts. I wasn’t speaking to myself well though. I wasn’t interested. And therefore you wouldn’t be either. But I still feel my commentary about needing a strong team around you when you’re facing a terminal illness (or really, just in your life) is an essential thought to express. Maybe I just can’t tie everything into what I’m listening to at the moment. So it’s time for another reset. While I figure it out, posts might not come as often - I don’t want to flood you with crap. Musically, I’ll post something when it feels just right. Politically, when I hear about something that affects me deeply (and right now I am (and you should be) deeply concerned about the future - and I’ll do my best to be sure what I post about is the truth. (For what it’s worth, if you’re looking for integrity in reporting - and no matter what side of the divide you fall on, you should be, do yourself a favor and inspect the Media Bias Chart. This is an interactive chart - you can input your source and see where it falls on the spectrum. It’s super essential in these times of pure duplicity that we keep ourselves reliably informed. Its interesting that there is virtually no centrist misinformation out there! The chart looks like a flock of geese overhead.) Medically, I’ll post updates when something interesting comes up.

In the last week, I’ve had an exosome infusion - I’m being told not to expect any noticeable results for several weeks, ordered home based NAD+ treatments, been diligent with my PEMF (I’ve even got Wendy doing a few sequences for herself!) device and had a fruitful visit with my primary care team. My bloodwork was all good, my A1C was down, and the only things I was worried about (thyroid and CBC levels because I’m freezing cold ALL THE TIME. Seriously, I just bought fingerless gloves for inside the house so I can type. I now officially am the star of a dystopian TV show.) were fine. My blood pressure is high, so I’m going back on Hydrochlorothiazide, which I was not taking because I went on Propranolol for Essential Tremors. So, now I’ll do all three. I fought with the endoscopy folks (mentioned last post) all week long, before finally getting on the schedule for mid-april. It took 4 full days of phone calls. I was finally given the scheduling manager’s phone number - which didn’t accept voicemail. The message, however, was “from” the previous manager and mentioned that she (the new manager is a male) was going to be out of the office for a week in JULY! Last summer. No wonder things are a mess, when the head of scheduling doesn’t even bother to update their out of office/busy message. Maybe Musk needs to DOGE that office a bit, rather than the National Parks Service. Just saying. (And yes, I know it’s not a government office. I’m being hyperbolic!) I’m awaiting delivery of copies of all my MRI and PET scans so I can bring them to my second opinion (hopefully new) neurologist in Boston. Still not sure how all that will play out. And finally, I have Leqembi infusion number 15 (thirty weeks!) tomorrow morning. Inshallah all will go well!

Thanks for reading!

Dy